So I've been at this weight-loss/fitness/healthy-lifestyle thing for about a month now, and I'm seeing progress. I've done stuff like this in the past (yes I completed the first month and a half of Insanity, lost 20 pounds and four inches, and then gained it all right back again) and it's never really stuck with me.
But for some reason, this time it's different.
I don't know if it's because I'm feeling it, physically and mentally, a full-on life changing experience (yuck! SO not at that level yet), or if it's simply because my husband is noticing it. Don't get me wrong, my husband and I have a very healthy, loving, caring relationship, but we've had major discussions about the future of our bodies; what will happen when I'm old and saggy and can't do stuff? He's active and fit and energetic and loves being outdoors or working out. I am the polar opposite of that. I've always said, "I'll never BE like you. I don't enjoy those things. You didn't marry a skinny minnie. I'll never be a size 2..." you name it. And that still rings true today, but I can see myself liking it for his benefit; I can see myself becoming healthier for the benefit of us. Yes, I want to get in shape and be sexy with a tight body for my man, but I also want this for the betterment of our relationship.
It's nice to say, "I married you for what's inside, not outside," but honestly - that's not 100% accurate. Everyone judges based on outside appearance to some degree. I WANT to be attracted to my partner, as I'm sure he does of me. So letting myself go isn't healthy, for me personally or for the attraction aspect of being with another person. Don't get me wrong, I'm still 100% the lazy, rather-be-inside-reading, exercise-HATING, food-junkie, big-girl-at-heart woman he married, and a part of me will always be. Like I said, I'll never be a size 2. But that doesn't mean I can't take care of myself, keep myself looking good, keep myself healthy so I can live a long life with him.
And this progress... I've lost 9 pounds in one month. I've been doing this C25K program, actually going to the gym with him from time-to-time, and hating every step of the way. But I'm loving how it's making me more energized, helping me lose weight and build muscle, and allowing me to get on his level... someday. We do this together, yet one more thing we can relate to one another on. Sure, my 20 minute jog is simply a warm-up for him, but he encourages and supports and pushes me, and afterwards, slaps me on the butt, gives me a big kiss and says, "Good job babe." That's why I truly do it.
And that's why I'll keep it up. Eventually I think I'll be doing it for me just as much as for him, but for now, I'm content with knowing that he glows when he sees me reach my goals. It makes him proud and let's be honest, slightly aroused ;)
I'll be doing monthly weigh-ins and maintaining a lower-calorie intake until I reach my goal (hopefully by September) of 150 lbs. Let's see how this goes!
Until next time...